Art & Vulnerability

Making Art and the creative process in itself leaves you feeling exposed. Layers get peeled away and you often find yourself sitting at the canvas moved by emotion, joy, happiness, sadness all can flow through you as you work. Sometimes it feels like that the paintbrush is moving itself, and you are just witnessing the process, other times it can be a battle to even pick up the brush and everything is clunky, sometimes this is a phase and you can enter the dreamlike state via some difficulty. Everyday is different and every hour is different. Starting the work is hard no matter what, a blank canvas can be incredibly intimidating. The emptiness of it before you make your first mark. It’s like standing above the ocean before diving into it. It’s daunting, once you are in the ‘zone’ or the ‘muse’ as it’s sometimes called takes over, it can feel effortless. You can come out of a trance of creation and can be shocked by what’s in front of you.

Sometimes tears will fall down your face and sometimes these are filled with frustration and self doubt and questioning the whole point of this. Why do I have to make this? Why am I being called to do it? Negative self talk is inevitable as an artist. Working through it can be ignoring it and physically painting the canvas, I sometimes just play on a practice one, it’s like a warm up and it can help me get into the right headspace.